30th October 2007,
4.30pm Tuesday. Today has been real busy, was on leave yesterday and the load just pick up. But am coping well.
Has been doing a lot of soul-searching for the past few weeks. Evaluating my reaction in the workplace, analyzing myself... my response towards offenses and criticism. Am actually not a person of strong character, strong character in the sense of iron-willed, but I can be determined if I want to do something that I feels right. It's a little mixture. I can also be very emotional..which is vey bad. I can mixed my emotion in how I handle issues in life, in work. And to some point I can be very defensive. As I analyzing myself, I realise that my character has changed over time. I don't know whether this is good, or this is normal. People said your temperament will change over time, depending on your dealing each day. What a complexity of human nature...
When I was young, I always feel like wanting to grow up fast into adulthood, but now.. as I'm aging, I wanna return to my childhood time. As I reflect back, maybe... I lost the 'innocent' of being a child, or 'childlikeness', or the "naive-ness". I hope it's not too late to realise this.. We're in the world but not of the world. We work not in human-system for God-system.. God's way of thinking is higher than worldly thinking. If worldly wisdom holds us back from God, it's NOT wisdom at all. We must be careful,..Ro 12:10 is very true, not to CONFORM to the standard of the world, but to be TRANSFORMED by renewing our mind.
